Social Media and The Self Esteem Bubble
Scott Greenfield has an interesting post about self esteem, and how the "self esteem movement" may not be all that it's cracked up to be. ("The Best Place to Find Self Esteem.") He notes that that "feeding your need for unwarranted high self-esteem won't produce Utopia." In fact, it could ultimately produce negative effects, and may ultimately be injurious to society.
Of course, what prompts the self esteem discussion is the internet - currently our favorite source for generating self esteem:
What's changed? You guessed it. With interactions increasingly becoming social (i.e., attached to our "true" and "authentic" online personas), flattery and faux kudos are on the rise. In fact they are the norm. People compliment each other endlessly and mindlessly. The internet has become a giant self esteem pyramid scheme of sorts. [I have no idea what the precise cause is, but in my neck of the woods, increased use of social media by professionals as an overt branding tool definitely seems to contribute to this.]
All of this raises another point worth thinking about: apart from the negative effects of having people running out there with inflated senses of themselves, we may also be building a self esteem bubble. Should we be worried about what's going to happen when it bursts?
Related post: "Twitter and the Cult of Positivity."
Of course, what prompts the self esteem discussion is the internet - currently our favorite source for generating self esteem:
After all, isn't self-esteem what the internet is all about, allowing us to authentically engage with people of great accomplishment and talent despite our having nothing whatsoever to commend us? We're all worthy. Get a twit from your hero and you're just as important and heroic as anyone else, like a social media rock star.What's interesting about this is that this is a relatively recent phenomenon. I don't have any claim for being an early active participant on the internet, but my anecdotal observations are that in the "early days," you could put yourself out there, but you were just as likely to be ripped to shreds as you were affirmed by the adoring masses (or by your "tribe"). In fact, one of the big benefits touted of the internet is that it is a gigantic merit-based system where the crowd functions as an adequate screening mechanism to separate the good ideas, arguments, and positions from the bad. You can put whatever you want out there, but chances are, someone else (somewhere) would cut it down to its appropriate size. Somewhere along the way, between GeoCities and Facebook, all of this changed.
What's changed? You guessed it. With interactions increasingly becoming social (i.e., attached to our "true" and "authentic" online personas), flattery and faux kudos are on the rise. In fact they are the norm. People compliment each other endlessly and mindlessly. The internet has become a giant self esteem pyramid scheme of sorts. [I have no idea what the precise cause is, but in my neck of the woods, increased use of social media by professionals as an overt branding tool definitely seems to contribute to this.]
All of this raises another point worth thinking about: apart from the negative effects of having people running out there with inflated senses of themselves, we may also be building a self esteem bubble. Should we be worried about what's going to happen when it bursts?
Related post: "Twitter and the Cult of Positivity."
I miss being called an idiot for posting something horrible/stupid/silly, really I do. i used to know what i was good at, now everything I do seems to be brilliant.
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Venkat, this post is amazing! Such care and precision go into your humble offerings for us devoted Spam Notes subscribers. Unlike many self-ascribed Internet experts, you bring truth to the table, backed by your profound personal and professional insights.
But seriously, what's the harm in inflated esteem? Twitter keeps the change agents / SMDBs off the street, and the Scott Greenfields entertained. And when the bubble bursts: widerspread humility won't be bad for the world, will it?
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This comment made me smile. Excellent comment!
Good question as to the harm (if any). I would think there would be some, but then again, I'm not a psychologist. (Although I do play one on the internet on occasion...)
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This self-esteem phenomenon starts early, and that too is a change. On my 14 year old daughter's FB page, I see all kinds of comments under her friends photos like "You are so gorgeous!" or "Beautiful, beautiful" "so hot" - this is between girlfriends (not my daughter, fortunately). It is beyond a little sweet - it is a weird narcissistic obsession which is what all of this self-esteem stuff is. I can't ever, ever imagine having said this kind of stuff to my h.s. friends, or even my sisters. In any event, if this type of behavior is being inculcated early, I don't think there is much hope for change.
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